Imagine this: You come home late after work only to find your better half fast asleep. Then you wake up the next morning and reach out to cuddle your partner only to find that they’ve already left for work. Now imagine that this was happening every day of the year. Wouldn’t it put a strain on your relationship?
Unfortunately, couples with conflicting work schedules often face this age-old problem: How can I spend more time with my partner and keep the spark alive in our relationship? It’s difficult to keep the embers of the relationship glowing when you work the night shift while he’s working all day.
So, what can you do to work through your conflicting schedules to keep the relationship going? Here are some tips:
Keep an Open Line of Communication
Communication is the key to enjoying a successful relationship. This is especially true when you don’t have time to have daily face-to-face conversations with your significant other. No matter how busy you are at work, make time to send a text, make a phone call or have a quick video call with your wife or husband. Tell them how much you miss them or love them or look forward to spending time with them this weekend.
Always Schedule Some Time Together
I know, I know. This is hard. But it’s essential to schedule some time together no matter how hectic your schedule is. Pencil in date nights or long lunches together (if you both can spare the time). Even just having a meal together or sipping on hot cocoa while binge-watching the latest TV show on Netflix can be beneficial for your relationship. Share your Google calendars with each other. Make that extra effort to take some time off to reconnect and bond.
Make Small Gestures Count
When you’re busy achieving a sales target, meeting a deadline or making a presentation for a potential new client, it can be quite challenging to express your love for each other. Buying flowers or making those large romantic gestures can seem like an arduous task.
The good news is that you don’t need to go out of your way to show your husband or wife that you care. Small gestures like bringing home their favorite meal, leaving cute post-it notes where they can easily find or recording that football match he missed shows that you care.
Schedule Intimacy and Romance
Ok, so you’ve scheduled date nights together but what about enjoying those romantic getaways together or planning a much-needed annual vacation to an exotic island on the Caribbean? You need to plan for a significant time off from work where it’s just you and him.
Speaking of you and him, a couple’s sex life always takes a hit when both partners rarely see each other during the week. It may sound counterproductive since sex is supposed to be spontaneous but there’s no room for spontaneous sex when you barely see each other. Which is why it’s vital that you schedule sex and intimacy. If one of you has a flexible schedule, then try to meet your spouse halfway and move meetings around so that you can get that much-needed time together.
Accept Your Conflicting Work Schedules
A lot of couples try to fight it and some even make half-hearted promises that their schedules will be less cluttered soon. But the reality is that right now your work schedule is crazy busy and you need to work on solutions rather than wait for things to get better. Embrace your hectic life and make the most of your present situation.
Still having trouble working through conflicting work schedules? Feel free to contact Orly Gueron a Licensed marriage and family therapist and relationship specialist in Aventura, FL!